Bad Christian Tweets and other Twilight references

Spoiler alert: Bella marries Edward.

• I never want to see a vampire give birth ever again. Ever.

• Is it me or did the venom and morphine scenes take you back to riding Body Wars at Epcot, circa 1989?

• Jackson Rathbone, love of my life, what happened to your hair?

• Chess metaphor. Explain, please.

• Bella is possibly the worst girlfriend/wife ever. You only get to love, honor, and cherish one man in your life. Pick one.

• I love a house with nice architecture and design, but seriously Cullen family, would having a set of curtains kill you? (answer: no. because they are vampires and immortal. duh).

• Let's be honest, there's probably no good way to portray werewolves having a conversation with each other. Did James Earl Jones do the voice over? I'm sure of it.

• None of the luggage had any TSA stickers on them. What a scam. There's no way this story is real!

• Hate to recycle old material, but point 5 still holds true. Men (if you're still reading): the fitted shirt. the rolled sleeves. you had me at hello.

• My favorite scene was toward the beginning when Emmett walked by carrying an entire tree. 

• Incredibly grateful that "hold on tight, spider monkey" has not been included in any future films." 

• If I ever get married in a forest, Alice is so planning my wedding. Those white droopy things were gorgeous.

• Swing music at the reception! 

• Current reigning champion for Worst Christian Tweet about the movie: "The only Breaking Dawn I'm looking forward to is the Breaking Dawn of my Savior."